rage
An incident occurred at around midnight which has put me in a perpetual state of pissed off, and after having spent 45 minutes on the phone to my poor friend ranting about the incident, we decided it would be a good idea for me to take advantage of my state of rage and blog about some of the other things in the world that piss me the fuck off.
1. People who stand on the wrong side of the escalators.
I fucking HATE it when people decide that it’s okay to stand on the left side of the escalators despite the fact that there are at least 20 signs saying ‘please stand on the right’. Even if you’re a fucking tourist and can’t read/understand English, you should at least be smart enough to see what everybody else is doing and follow the fucking trend. Escalators are about as fast as a sedated donkey on a good day, and so when I’m in a rush and politely ask these idiots to move the fuck out of my way, I really don’t understand why they huff and puff at me like I’ve just asked them to fucking shove a cone up their asses whilst performing the Macarena.
2. Teenagers who listen to music on the bus.
Nobody needs to hear the shit music coming from your phone. And what is the point in holding the phone up to your ear when it’s on fucking speaker anyway? You’re on the top deck and the fucking driver can hear that shit, so really, WHAT IS THE POINT? There’s these things called headphones … use them. THEY COME FREE WITH THE FUCKING PHONE. Oh … and what’s that … you want to sing along as well? Don’t. Your ’singing’ sounds more like the sound Paris Hilton’s parrot makes when trying to sing along to her songs. Shut the fuck up.
3. People who decide it’s a good idea to just stop walking.
As if people who walk slower than your average garden snail aren’t bad enough, we have these wonderful morons who decide it’s a BRILLIANT idea to just stop walking in the middle of the street for no logical reason. Bonus points to the idiots who decide to go Oxford Street with suitcases. Don’t fucking cry because I have purposely kicked your suitcase over. You fucking deserved it, now kindly fuck off.
I did have more things to add to this list, but I’ve decided to go to bed instead. So instead of crying about not having more to read, go and do something productive … like fucking yourself.
Sweet dreams.
8 Comments, Comment or Ping
Elizabeth
I share your valid points of rage. I am also the “poor friend” who shares your timezone. 1.48am. Goodnight!
Feb 22nd, 2009
Elizabeth
It is now 1.56 am, and for some reason unknown to both you or I, I have felt the need to comment again. I feel that my previous comment was greatly lacking in any sort of cheer, so I would like to add a simple
to brighten up your night/morning.
Feb 22nd, 2009
Jen
Funny how I agree with the whole “people standing on the wrong side of the escalator thing” only in Australia, it’s customary to stand on the left, not the right — people think you’re rude if you stand on the right. Must have something to do with us driving on the left too, hrmm.
Feb 22nd, 2009
Becca
Maren ur a funny fucker wot r ur thoughts on the americans who come into our pub?
Feb 22nd, 2009
Kaylee
Why are there no escalator rules in Canada? There are no signs or anything, and people can just block the whole path D:
*petitions for rules to be implemented*
And speaking of teenagers and music, I once witnessed a group of about 6 guys go into a Pizza Pizza, set up iPod speakers to listen to their gangsta rap while ONE of them ordered a slice of pizza, then pick up their speakers and leave. I didn’t want to live in the same world as them
Feb 22nd, 2009
Debbie
You know what makes me get the rage? Your face
But seriously, all of those things make me get a little stabby. Another one is those who have conversations on their phone while the other person is on speaker. Die!
Feb 24th, 2009
Chantelle
It sounds like you had something of a rough day. We have escalator rules in Seoul too. In general, people follow them. But when public places are packed with people, the rules are figuratively suffocated to death, and everyone ignores them. Both sides of the escalator and every bit of the stairways are clogged with people.
My friend walks and then stops habitually. It’s annoying. Sometimes, I think she’s trying to make me run into her.
Feb 27th, 2009
Macca
I always wanted to write a blog about things I hate on public transport, and those things would have been on it. worst is when someone leans on the (particularly a vertical) rail in a packed tube so nobody else can hold it.
Oct 25th, 2009
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